"I told you so....."

I guess the best place to start is as the beginning right........

So, Monday.....I went and saw my primary care Doctor.....and caught him up to speed on what I've been up to. We also discussed my abdominal pain, and he agreed with the direction I want to go......And suggested that I get a second GYN opinion. Well, I know how this game is played, and I had already made an appointment with my regular GYN.......I'm due for my annual, so thought I'd talk to her while I was there about what she thinks. My PCP is also requesting my records from all these ultrasounds so he can take a closer look.

Tuesday.....I met with the breast surgeon, to follow-up from surgery. My test results came back benign again:) Seems this time is was the beginning of a tumor, but not the same kind I had the first time. This doc talks super fast......and I tend to miss a lot of what she says!! She did something about it just being normal hormonal changes. Hopefully tomorrow, I can go request these records, and when I get them back, I'll let you know what term they used. My scab has almost completely fallen off, and the scar is looking great!!

Wednesday.....I felt like Crap! My insides hurt, and I ended up with an awful migraine.....So I slept most of the day.


And today I went back for my follow-up ultrasound........and guess what......That cyst on my ovary is still bleeding!!! Well....duh!!! I so badly wanted to say.."I told you so!!" But I didn't. Luckily I remembered to take a Valium before I went in, so I was on my bestest behavior! So......Where do we go from here??? I have 2 options.......either I go back on hormones/ birth control to control the growth of the cysts.....which I really don't want to do. I have been on these types of medications before, and it was no picnic.....plus I truly believe that it was one of the triggers for my heart acting up. So, I'm really scared about going back on them. My 2nd option is another surgery. However, because I've had so many female surgeries in the past, this surgery will be tricky. And, if they get in there, and if my ovary is bad enough, they'll have to remove it, and I'll go into early menopause. And, well, I don't think my heart can handle that either. So once again, I'm lost. I have no idea what the hell to do anymore.....and quite frankly I'm tired of making all these life altering decisions. I just want to live. I just want to get on with my life, and yet, there's always something holding me back.

And yet, on the flip side.......I'm doing my homework on this one. I've been trying to read everything I can get my hands on, and I'm taking notes! I also have a list of questions that I can't find the answers to else where, and I plan on taking these with me to both GYNs. I see my regular one next week......and then I go back to the Specialist in the beginning of November to talk some more. (This was his first available appt, so I had to go with it.) But, it gives me time to get my second opinion......and check out a few other options, too. I'm determined to get to the bottom of this!!

And once again, I prove to myself that I'm not Crazy, Woo-Who!!!