Saturday, January 30, 2010

Thyroid update.

Thought while I was on here...I should post an update, huh.

So, let's see. My blood work on my thyroid came back normal. But my ultrasound did not. Seems I have an enlarged thyroid (Thyromegaly, as it reads on the report)....and I have a 1.9 cm solid nodule on my left lobe. Fun, huh! I have had A Lot of crazy thoughts go through my head since I got the news, but for the most part , I think I have settled my nerves down. I don't get to see a specialist until April, which annoys me because I'm ready for answers NOW! I Hate waiting. But on the bright side of things, my PCP doesn't think it's cancerous, so that's good. Just another bump in my road, I guess. But I tell you this, I am really Tired of learning about new body parts. If I had wanted to know all this I would been a doctor or something. But it does make me think that with this knowledge, one may come in handy. Just wish I could remember everything I read. Half of it is lost as soon as I read it, not to mention that the other half is not even understandable. Don't they have a Dummy's guide to the human body...something with words that I could understand? I don't get half of it. I do try and write down my questions though...and I try to copy the important stuff into my notes. That way, when I'm at the doctors, I at least have a general idea of what he'll be talking about, and if I have any questions, I can ask them, them. other words, I still really have no clue as to what is going on. I ask myself how much of my 'heart symptoms' are actually thyroid issues, and if they can be fixed with meds. Wouldn't that be awesome! If I eventually became symptom free.....I wouldn't even know what to do with myself, lol.

Still haven't made an appoint with my OBGYN........I'm still wore out from all the crap I've dealt with so far, I'm just running low on umph! I look at it like this. I don't want to go on meds, and I don't want to lose my last ovary either. So, I wait it out, and see what happens. I can live with me an excuse to take long hot baths. Mind of matter right. Or maybe I'm just being stubborn.

I dunno.....
I know this much
I'm open to any advice or info any one has on thyroid issues. Any good website recommendations? Any thing I should know about as far as meds go? Anything I should know period? Any tips, books.....Anything? I'd really appreciate any advice anyone has to offer! Thanks!

Until Next Time......

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

I'm still here......

Yes! I know, I am long overdue on a post......But don't worry, you haven't missed much! I took the month of December off! I decided that I needed a month of no doctors! No stress! No BS! I'm 'sick' and there's nothing that can be done about that....and all the other little things are just bumps in the road, But Dang it! I need a break sometimes! And if that means staying away from the stress of the doctors, then so be it. I honestly could use another month or 2 to hide, but I'm afraid that if I put things off any longer, I may cause more damage. So....with that said:

I saw my PCP yesterday to catch up and try and get a handle on somethings. When I had my annual exam with my regular OBGYN, she told me that my Thyroid was 'prominent" and that I needed to get it checked out. Well......My step-sister has had hers removed, then My Mom had hers removed this past year....and well, it's just something I didn't want to deal with over the holidays! I can't tell you how many times I have spent the holidays sitting at the hospital waiting on a CT, or blood work, or preparing for surgery.....and well, this year, I didn't want to do that! However, my life isn't really about me, it's about all those people that surround me, and well, I can't let them down. So, yesterday, I got my blood work done, and the doc has ordered an ultrasound to check it out further. Funny thing is I now know where my Thyroid is.....From what I read yesterday, your not suppose to be able to feel it at all......Unless it's acting up~ so maybe now that I've said something aloud about it, it will go away! Honestly, I've felt it acting up for months now, but I honestly made myself believe that I was just having sympathy 'aches' for my Mother.....Or I blamed it on my sinus draining.....Yes, I have been trying to think of everything else, but the worse case scenario....I'm just tired of being cut open.....Really! I'm over it!

And then to top it all off, I can't stop thinking about going back to school. About where my life isn't going. I had so many dreams of what my life was going to be like...and they're all coming back to me. I just don't know how to balance doing something with myself and taking care of myself. It's depressing! I keep telling myself that there's a bigger plan, and that this is how I'm suppose to prepare for it......but it makes my head hurt thinking about what it is that I'm preparing for, ya know! Life!

......and we can't forget about my ovary! Next month I gotta get an ultrasound to see if that cyst has shrunk any....and yet, I don't have a doctor I trust to talk to about it. I like my primary OBGYN~ But she sent me up stream along time ago, because my case was too complex....and I don't blame her! Actually I respected her for being honest with me about it. Yesterday, my PCP told me to go back to her, and see if I can't find a new starting point. I really don't wanna, and still haven't called. I just feel like I'm running in circles....well, maybe crawling in circles would be more like it, lol. Point is, I'm going nowhere fast, and IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS!!!

So, as I sit here and prepare for my next ride, I think. and Think.....and think........
Will I ever be able to get past this?????

Until next time.....